One of the things I’m most looking forward to post-wedding is having Hayley live with me rather than downstairs in a different apartment. The status quo presents several frustrations that I am more than happy to be rid of.. No more guessing and worrying about whether or not the other is actually awake and out of bed in the morning (which was a FAIL this morning as I showed up for morning prayer and Hayley was still sleeping). No more “oh crap, I left that pan down at my apartment!” revelations as we’re speedily trying to prepare a meal. No more staying up late so I don’t feel like I’m abandoning Hayley as she does some internety things at my place late into the evening when I would rather be sleeping (NOTE: she doesn’t have internet access at her apartment – she mooches).
All things considered, it’s an extremely excellent thing that she’ll be moving in. There are, however, a few minor concerns I’m trying to wrap my head around.. (Be aware that I’m not directing any of my thoughts/complaints/reflections at Hayley – I’m just trying to get used to a new reality. And I’m trying to be funny about it.)
(see if you can find the easter egg in the image)
#1) Closets
I won’t use an actual picture of Hayley’s closet, but I think this one is a mildly decent representation of what it looks like. Essentially, it’s full of clothing. Lots of clothing. Take this picture and add in another 50% more and we’re just about there.
Women have clothes. I get that. It may be annoying to me on some levels, but I recognize that women think and function differently than men do when it comes to the amount of clothing they have. Women have skirts or blouses that one work in combination with only one other skirt or blouse – this is not something men deal with, and thus the plethora of clothing can be considered somewhat reasonable for the fashionable woman. Simply, women have “outfits”.. Men only use that word when referring to military units.
I do, however, have one major concern with this situation.. Where am I going to put all of my clothes? I have 4 pairs of jeans, 4-5 slacks, 1 suit, a couple dozen dress shirts, a dozen polos, and a bunch of t-shirts.. Add in socks, gym clothes, undergarments, and ties; I need a little bit of space as well. Not a cavernous closet of my own, but I do need to hang up something!
Well, once the wedding bells have rung, I think I’ll be living out of boxes for a few months. We don’t have any bedroom furniture (currently), so I can’t just fold up everything and place it in a dresser.. We will go purchase a bedroom set at some point, but even then I’m a bit concerned about the direction I’m heading in. I feel like I need a separate storage unit just to manage the SHOES! OHHHH, THE SHOES!
I’m certainly being dramatic for the fun of it, but I am really curious as to how this will work itself out.
(MAJOR NOTE: This issue of enough space is also a concern when it comes to the bathroom, balcony, and the apartment in general for that matter… It is going to be crowded!)
*sigh*
#2) Decorations
I know I currently live in a glorious bachelor pad, and with a woman moving in things will change. But.. I don’t know that I’m ready for a million pillows on my couches.
Hayley is already excited to start sewing some pillow cases that we can use to have a ton of pillows around the living room… Then she wants to find some really classy art stuff, work on setting a theme (potentially using a grass-green as the base color), and essentially destroy my soul as a consequence of all this femininity.
I will have a great deal of patience with new decor if our place looks nice (according to my standards of nice), but this is one of the few areas where Hayley and I have disagreements. Hayley is a little more glamorous than I am, I suppose; I mean, she did request we season pass Gossip Girl on the TiVo… My dream home is a large and spacious lodge with huge windows, wooden furniture, big comfy couches, and lots of earth tones. Hayley would be much happier in the classic colonial mansion with very fashionable drapes blocking out significant amounts of natural light..
I think there is enough overlap where we can be happy, but we have honestly not yet discovered enough overlap to assuage my fears. Part of this is just me being stubborn about losing my man-cave of an apartment, so of course I recognize my thoughts as pretty ridiculous. I do, however, wonder if I’ll one day wakeup to find ruffles on everything… This sounds like a potential nightmare for me!
#3) Relaxation Habits
I will keep this short: I don’t like cuddling while I play video games. It’s distracting, I get warm really fast, and someone keeps bumping my arm.. Cuddling while playing Red Dead Redemption is like mixing milk with Mountain Dew – it can be done, but no one enjoys it.
I think this is something every man needs to get used to though – the Mass Cuddle Effect. I hereby swear that I will cuddle during all chick-flicks, episodes of Community, and before bedtime as long as I can avoid my husbandly duties during game time. I think this is the most fair thing I’ve ever agreed to. :)
— And now I will subtly retract my tongue from my cheek region.
